Types of lies!

-An in depth analysis :-P

The word “lie” is a descendant of the German word “leogan”. A lie is a type of deception in the form of an untruthful statement made to someone else with the intention to deceive. To lie is to state something one believes to be false with the intention that it be taken for the truth by someone else. Lets get back to the topic! Types of lies?? I am sure that all of us would have heard the song “Ra ra Ramaiah” from the blockbuster rajinikanth movie “batsha”.. My favorite line in this song is “yettu yetta manisha vaazhka pirichiko.. adhil nee endha ettil ippo iruke nenachiko!!”. What does this line have to do with my post?? Any guesses?? Bulls eye!! Am gonna classify the lies age wise!! ;-)

Let’s get started..!

0-8 yrs:

Now lets spare the new-born babies.. They are the only uncorrupted souls in the planet. Consider this example. All kids, have the habit of eating, biting whatever they see on the floor. Eventually, they get to use chalk piece. They get so fascinated by its appearance, that they start eating it .. the kid’s parents would have already been warned by the docs that if the kid eats anymore chalk pieces, its stomach will become the humble abode of all the “poochis”. :-P the kid still doesn’t stop eating it and when the parent asks “what happened to the box full of chalk pieces I got u last week??”. The kid says “Mommy, I swear I din eat them. Kartik took them all!”.
Now.. it’s a very simple lie. But it all starts from here ;-)
I ve tried this trick many times! ;-)

8-16 yrs:

Propensity to lie varies greatly between children. We see cheating and lying in our schools, as little humans cheat off each other's tests, use plagiarism on their reports and a lie to the teacher about their homework being eaten by their dog. Their dog on the other hand would never lie; a much gentler species. So children in this age group would lie at the max about their scores in exam, homework. Another common example.

Mom : what happened to your exam results??
Child : hmmm… I haven’t received them as yet! (Pacha poi! Flunked miserably)

16-24 yrs:

This is the post adolescence period. And 2 important things happen here. 1. Cupid’s arrows strike most of them and 2. Career.
When a guy enters college, and is being asked about his girlfriend.. the fantastic lie he says is,
” For the past 2 years, I’ve never looked at a television, nor computer, my whole concentration has been devoted to studies. Girl friends?? Who needs them??”
When it comes to career, we try to please people by lying in a smooth discourse and hence will remain unnoticed. We might hate our team leader from the bottom of our hearts, but end up saying that

X (says): Sir, I am so lucky to have you as my boss. You are my guide and god father!
X ( thinks): somebody pls save me from this Hitler and take me away from this grotty place.

24-32 yrs:

This is the period when most of us jump into the matrimonial well.. Consider an arranged marriage.. am sure, a book has to be maintained on the lies that are uttered. Lies like, “I ve never been committed before”, “I ve never met anyone who is as intelligent as you are”. All these silly lies, just to impress a person who is a complete stranger!
Consider a love marriage.. When the parent asks” how long have you been committed?”
The answer will be “just a few months mom..” they would have actually been seeing each other for years together.

32-40 yrs:

This is the funniest part of any person’s life. Consider this situation. The child will come up and show the report card, and parents will get annoyed seeing the marks. The most atrocious lie they ll say is,
“Is this a mark? When I was studying in school, I always used to be the topper! I am highly disappointed in you!”.
The child is so innocent that, the idea of cross checking with his grand father doesn’t occur to him. The parent would have been one of the most notorious and the dumbest kid!

40-48 yrs:

When a person reaches this milestone, it is very difficult for him/her to digest the fact that he/she is gonna look and feel old from then.

Wife: How do I look in this outfit?
Husband: you look ravishing.. Jus like how you were when we got married.

Both of them know that it’s the worst lie.

Man needs his son as a by runner when he plays cricket, but claims that he is training his son for the marathon!! :-P

48-56 yrs:

It so happens that, parents (once upon a time 20 yr olds) are always against love.
They would have actually had a love marriage and would have told their children that it was a perfect, typical, traditional and horoscope matched arranged marriage! So, when their son confesses that he is in love... They ll react as if he were a part of the al quaeda terrorist attack! :-P

56-64 yrs:

This is the retirement period. In this modern world, everything reaches you at your doorstep, ahem.. including illness. So the docs and your children will restrict you from eating all the yummy stuff around you. Come on! My philosophy is “Live to eat!” :-P
So there is nothing wrong in lying that “I never ate that croissant!”

That’s it folks. I know that this post is not didactic. I am not a Dessek or harichandran’s grand son’s grand daughter to say that I don’t lie. All of us do. Let’s try to limit them. The truth is definitely a lot more *bitter* but safer. It’ll have only instant implications but perhaps a happier future. :-)